Hungry

oh Lord.. how I hunger for you.. yet why are things bothering me? I pray that this SAP course will be a sucess and I will be absorbed into this company.. but I pray I may grow abit mroe in RLC before being sent out, yet I am ready to rely on you whenever you feel it's time for me to head into the world.

Today my dad gave advice to, a brother in choir.. and he said have children earlier better, look at me, then he pointed at me... man.. am I that much of a curse?... or am I just a burden.. I dunno.. prehaps I try to hard to speak to my Earthly Dad... I was so hurt when he poitned that statement out.. but now thinking about it.. how much earlier could he of had me..? I know My God you have planned me to be here today, for if I were not then at this time, then things between me and you would be different... no matter what I know God's faithful n beside me... yet the hurt turned my mood of worship to super down mode.. I'm sorry Father God in heaven.. my worship was not as gd today... but I am glad you still choose to listen and dance with me at the end...

everything is coming at once Father God.. I dunno how much longer I can take this.. yet you make it ok in the end.. you always hold me back up... I wonder what would happen if I didn't have Jesus in my life.. sigh,... people ask me what is wrong.. and my eyes tear up.. yet I held it back and said nothing.. oh God... am I leader of yours?... is this why the devil is attacking?... oh Lord protect pastors of this world.. whom go through even worst persecutions form the devil roaring.. but I am glad their in you and that they are protected by your rod and staff... Lord... protect my care grp leader Florence.. she seems busy now a days.. and I want her to talk to me and communicate... coz I too am her intern.. I need her to work with me Lord.. I want your sheep to have the best... Lord oh Lord use me... protect each and every one of those sheep... ah.. Father God.. your mercies are new every morning...

I stand,... in your presence... stripped with all my faults uncovered, in the Light, yet.. I do not fear so much of what will happen to me, because your blood has covered me and clothed me in white robes... I stand innocently coz Christ died innocently for me... oh Father God.. I know you are near now... coz I feel your hand of comfort... change me... I'm no mistake this I know... coz you made me...

-Chris(message to God)