Fail?

So many people have told me don't give up when your almost there... is there a almost there? why can't I reach there?! some times I don't understand... why is it I try so hard and I fial PREHAPS I try too hard... maybe it's nto my trying.. I dunno I didnt even try... argh nothing makes sense... my life is turning n twisting.. prhaps my root is too weak.. I'm losing it... I dunno.. watering and watering.. I GUESs wont work... everythign I think or read maybe read all wrongly I GET THE wrong impression.. I'm too fckign happy for my own gd.. I guess I should go back to depression and rot there where I belong.. who ever reads this I guess u'r probally one of the people who influenced me to rot :)