Chapter 3

as the facts say, girls are stronger when thier younger

here comes to he end of my era with Laura, one of the prettiest girls I have ever been on a date with;How did it happen?, I ask myself that same qeustion this very day. But from what I remember, it was because she started to constantly whack me, I told her to stop, but she wouldn't, eventually blowing up at each other, our first and last argument was on that day,the words she said are stuck in my head. Well you always make me hang out with YOUR friends, you never come and let me hang outaround my friends. I guess it was my fault at the end, but at that young and naive age, I repelled screaming back, well I'm not the one trying to bully the other. At that point, silence fell upon the both of us. we ignored each other for the next few days. When we started talkign to one another we treated each others liek normal friends again, and hanging out seperatly like we used to do.
Many of my friends, especailly those whome were girls would often ask me. Why don't I get back with her, I would become very stuborn, and say never again. unconscience of why people were askign me to get back with her, even her best friend asked me.
Despite of all the waring and discomfort between the both of us, I still decided to turn up at her party, where only me her and her best friend were around. she had a cute lil doggy, and we watched movbies and stuff, it was a very peaceful night. After that night I left with a total different impression of her. the day after that night, I kind of missed her a little, but I did not want to admit it up to a point where iw as able to convince myself she wasn't worth the time at all. and it happened that a week later, she approached me alone. I was curious, and the words that came out her mouth, came with much pleading. Her voice so tenderly asked," forgive me please Spire, she looked me into my eyes, her round eyes glitering as it did before on the day we came together. Please Spire, Be with me once more.", in shock I answered, " I'm really really sorry.. I can't, I just can't be with you again, sorry" in stubborness I walked off, and she walked off looking down and unhappy. that was the end, and my first stage of changing my attitude.

Chapter 2

puppy love

Luara, Luara. how beautiful was she. 2 months in, and we were already as close as a knot on a shoe lace. she'd always tag along with me to hang out with my friends, the ones that would play catch and very active games. She got to know alot of the female friends I had.. since at that age we usually hang out with our own gender, ah but now a days I don't know how kids hang out.
Some breaks I would hang out with her friends... To me her friends were pretty boring.. but had very interessting topics to talk about, yet even when I try to be friends with them I could sense some hatered coming from them. The dark side =o. well to elaborate it, every time I hung out with them they would cut me otu of thier topic, walk infront of me or simply just ignore me... but even after all that I decided to stick with Luara and tolerate it all. =) puppy love is so strong. Gives you energy to do the most amazing things when your young.
The most amazing thing about Luara was that she had the most amazing eyes... hazel big and round, if she looked at you, I could grantee oyu would melt(taking in the fact that you are a boy or a lezo =p) we'd talk about things that were crazy,like astro spirit stuff... not that i understood it, but she practiced it with my friends... I tried it before.. never really worked, just gave me a better idea of how beautiful the night skies and stars were ^^;.
about 4 months in her birthday was coming up... like 2 months later. with a warm smile I accepted.. but I asked her is any other friends coming. She said yea David megan, ect... steph(her best friend) so she asked me to help her invite some friends too, so I invited he rest.. and they said yea sure. Witht he party coming up I was thinking of what to get her. I was excited... SO excited I went up to her and told her who was comming, and she gave a cheerful look and hug =). So here, our love was strong as ever.. not one argument, so perfect...

the beggining of a love so true

Chapter 1

It wasn't until 12 I started seeing some sort of potentail in girls. before that I thought of girls as 100% pure brats, haha. But I'm guessing they thought the same way of us guys, and probally still do. Ah, how rude of me. My name is Spire Ine, I'd prefer to disclose my age, but if you follow through my stories you will get the idea of how OLD I really am.
Back in the days when I was 12, I changed to a brand new school for the last year of PRIMARY! gee I was excited back then... meeting new friends, but I was never the type to actually go along with the 'trend' those days. People usually talked about spice girls and all, but I would never really of understaood what it was about untill that era was OVER.
However I did notice, that girls seemed to become more attractive, even tho, every one knows they really arn't at that age =p. as I gto to know more friends in that school I started to notice that girls and boys were holding hands and like cuddling each other. Hence I learnt the first word of 'getting together', BOYFRIEND and GIRLFRIEND. As baffled as I was back thenone girl in particular always had caught my eye. Her name was Laura, she was a show girl wiht yellow.. nah just kidding. but her name was Laura, I couldn't really take my eyes off her during class, and even times when we had to go to church and pracitice for the qoir.
One day as me and my friends were in church he asked, so, Spi, who do you fancy. whispering back I answered, Laura, but don't tell any one yea?. he said, ok. then the next minuite told my other friends which eventually spreaded to Laura, who looked back, and whispered to her friends, who then passed the message back to us saying yea, I like him to. My heart beated faster. In my head I was like what's going on? why's my heart beating so fast. My Girlfriends' said why don't you ask her out.(at that time not understanding that go out means ask her to be my girlfriend) I said, I can't my mum and dad won't let me go out alone. Then they told me going out with her doesnt mean you have to literally go out with her. Confusing me even more. so I eventually after 2 weeks understood what they meant by going out.
So on a summers afternoon I pulled some courage into myself and told her I liked her, she responed me too. With a little shivery voice I asked would you go out with me? she said yea. wow at that time I was so shocked and happy with a huge smile I held her hand. There was were my first love bloomed...

new post =o

Well, I havn't posted in a while now... for the past few days I been getting these crazy thoughts about my ex... I have no idea why, I even think about it... I mean at the end of the day she has ignored my text messages... about 80% of my Im's and my email... still I even do an auto prayer for her and really mean it fromt he bottom of my heart... but still... I have no Idea why.

Besides that, I went out wiht Ashley (my friend) latly to pyramid... ooo~~~ para fanatics lol xD we were so noobish the pros couldnt stop smurking at us xD. I think I'm getting better =p tho my arm did ache the next day.. I bet u ashley's did too xP no offence ash ahahhahahahha *clears throat* mwahhaa we decided next outing to go para again... before he leaves to aussie... prehaps have a nice time in the cyber cafe as well for the last few times... after that, I have no mroe friends to hang out with. No one I'm close to... Steven's gonna leave too lol isn't it great xD I have no one lolz... well I do, but no fun hanging out wiht people if thier gonna speak a language you dont understand amoung themselves...

Assighments are pouring in WOHOO *not* lolz but I mean I feel liek doing them.. probally somethign to keep me occupied or somehting I think oracle and director should be fun *grins* but then system design....*dies*. oo and events community service... dinner and dance....... PUBLIC SPEAKING COMPETITION @@ *sees stars* geeez alot of work... then theres a training we have o do for our assieghment... *wipes sweat off head*... thats a heck lot of work to do... but still I want to have a outing wiht my ex before her bday... shame she never replies.. I really need to know coz I want to get her a book.. and like, it costs lol. then my pet sis Jeng! her bday will be liek a week after my ex's. I need to ask sitoze if he's free to go for that one... as for my ex... dont even know if she wants to come xD any howz.. that day is all Jeng's from me to her as a brother =) least i could do... arranging a party... any hwoz.. thats about it folks... Adios and Take care...
God bless,
Chris

long time no post.. let's post some rubbish

Life's passing,
times growing... what do we do?
sit and wait;
only waiting for the time to come;
the time where we shall live once again.

Every one seems so sad;
Every one seems so down;
some are mad, some are red...
but no matter what is said.
You are still in my heart;

people look down on me;
people look up to me;
people curse me behind my back;
people dislike me.
people like you, hate me;
Yet, no matter hwat your in my heart.

I am now falling,
I feel for you;
but now I fall for me;
I am falling with no net for me to land on;
you rush to me;
you see me... but all you see
Is nothign more than a mere image;
the reflection of your sadness;
a reflection of you torment.

you ask me why I die for you;
you ask me why I was so stupid;
you ask me why I loved you;
you asked me why I never told you.

I say to myself, that you hate me;
I said to myself ,I love you;
I said to myself, I'll take a bullet for you;
you ask me why I never told you;
I said to myself, I did but u never listened...

now laying on the floor, bleeding,
nothign around but the swaying vultures.
by the time you see me, there will be nothing left
only a reflection of your sadness
a reflection of you torment,
you ask me why I died for you;
I died coz I cared for you,
I died because I couldn't stand u being tormented;
I died so you could be happy;
I dided so that you may once rejoice again;
I took a bullet for you;

Don't mourn, don't cry.
I did this so you may be happy;
so that you may once again see life;
see it to it's full potentail;
I dided so you could be free once again;

(a story, a poem for whatever you think, it's somthign I know thats true, and real. and too, would take a bullet for you... but how? I need courage... that takes time.. that takes heart.)